A Quick Look At The Past Three Years Of My Life

Hey-lo humans who are reading this poorly constructed post!

So as you all know, I disappeared for three years from my blog because of a little thing called life. And for those of you who don’t know – well, now you know!

There are plenty of questions in everyone’s head as to what is it that happened in these past years. Today, as the title reads, I’m going to be addressing just that.

So let’s begin from the start shall we?

I had to move to my hometown as we, well, had to move out. My hometown is this area which neither is a village nor town. I like to call it a town-village. I have no idea how else to describe it. Is this really a term though? Or have I coined a new term? Am I the inventor of a new word? Oh my God…..

I spent seven months there with my grandparents, my aunt and uncle and my younger cousin sister. Also this dog. Can not forget the dog. Ugh.
In the start I had few bits of le internet thanks to my younger brother’s constant whining and crying but I refused to use it largely because I had to save it up for him. Things an elder sibling has to do. Sacrifices and all for the younger one. Pfft.
I only used it to keep in touch with my friends (read : annoy the crap out of them) and things were going okay, until my laptop crashed. Big time.

No internet, no system – living those seven months was a complete torture to sum it up in a nutshell. So many people, no source of entertainment, so many people, constant bugging, so many people.
Yes, I said ‘so many people’ a lot of times. Why do you ask? Well,  imagine a socially awkward girl among a whole bunch of people. Perhaps now you can understand how annoyed I might have been.
And I’m Indian. Add that to the mix. Now imagine the situation. Can’t? I never could either. Until I lived that nightmare. The horror *shudders*

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Seven months later, we moved to a different place. Another crappy place. We didn’t have proper water facility for goodness sake! No internet again but finally as we were staying by ourselves, we got a cable connection for our TV. So I spent time watching a lot of series’ again. Boy oh boy was I so happy!
I’d go around saying, “My name is Barry Allen and I’m the fastest man alive! GO FLASH YESYES!!” My mom would just stare at me in utter disappointment. She’d say, “You’ve started again. Why are my kids not normal?”
Quick forward to the present day – my mom loves The Flash. When I used to watch it on TV she’d go all, “Woah!”, “My God!”, “This is awesome!”, “He’s so fast!” etc. She loves Empire the most though. She was shook by the season 2 finale and started screaming, “WHY DID THEY NOT SHOW WHAT HAPPENED AHEAD? WHO FELL?!” When I went home and binge watched my shows, she asked me to tell her what happened and I showed her the clip. She then proceeded to ask my father why is it that he unsubscribed to english channels. If he hadn’t, then she could see little glimpses as I’d watch. I miss mom..

Back on the topic at the hand, I stayed there for around 9-10 months I believe. It was until my school wasn’t decided. And when my new school was decided and also our flat picked out, we moved out to stay at the place where I currently am residing.

How has my life changed? Well, I ended up having two gap years after my tenth grade. I completed my twelfth year in a span of three months and somehow managed to pass with decent scores! I made new friends who are absolutely amazing and have restored my faith in humanity a little bit
I know, I know. Me? Making friends? When did this miracle happen? Yeah, I’m surprised too. Life is full of surprises now isn’t it?

Currently I’m pursuing my first year in the field of Engineering in a college away from home. Hostel life. BLAAAH.
Finally a step towards achieving my dream has been taken and I couldn’t be happier! Yay!

Situations were horrible and we faced a lot of hardships. Life turned out to be nothing like we had imagined and majority of the time we all were just really upset as to how events were turning out to be. My brother wasn’t the least bit upset though. He just was happy he got to see Power Rangers………………

In short, life wasn’t the slightest bit easy. When we thought things are starting to get better, this storm would knock on our main door and say, “Did you order for a problem?”

Things are finally shaping out better now. I’m proud of all of us for managing to keep ourselves together and come out stronger from the experiences. I know that all of this has made me so much stronger, a level of strong my twelve-year-old self never imagined she would reach.

Things are okay. Life isn’t great but it’s okay. And I’m fine with okay.

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On Disappearance and Re-Appearance

Hey-lo people of the internet!

Remember me? No? Well that’s understandable……

I know, I know. I’ve been missing for years. It’s been what three years since I’ve posted maybe?
Three years….woah that is a long, long time!

Well, neither did I go anywhere nor did anything happen to me. This wasn’t a planned leave either. So why did I suddenly disappear from the surface of the internet?
Well, I went to space with dolphins. I also starred in my own movie and even wrote a book. Did you not see me on the news? What?!
Oh how I wish something absolutely fantabulous happened to me which would have explained my disappearance so well.

But no, that is not even remotely close. In fact, everything was the opposite of fantabulous.

The reason why I had to take an unexpected leave of absence from the blogging world – or the internet in short – was because my family and I were literal nomads. We were shifting from one place to another. We weren’t stationary at one place. When our case was such, an internet connection was a privilege. A privilege we didn’t have.

Blah, blah. Excuses, excuses. Pfft.

I still remember oh-so clearly, when I texted my friends living in a country situated a sea across from where I am right now, the minute I had an internet connection. My goodness were they shocked!
It had been a year and a half till that moment. As my disappearance was so sudden, my friends all had jumped to some very, very scary conclusions. They all thought I was dead!

I found it so funny and laughed whereas they all just continued to curse me. I still find it funny. Oops!

All in all, my life has changed drastically in the past few years. And now I’m ready to share all of my experiences – the good and the bad, the new and the old – with all of you. I absolutely loved blogging and now, I’m ready to start again!

After all why share your feelings and experiences with the people around you, when you can do that on the internet with people who have no idea you exist right? Right?!

No matter how hard the circumstances were, we made it through so many trials and that is a victory to celebrate. Which is why I am now back to the blogging world.

I have a lot of new posts on my mind which I’ll be posting shortly. So I won’t be leaving anytime soon, or so I can hope. I would also like to take this opportunity to welcome all the new followers who had decided to follow my tiny little blog even if it wasn’t updated. Thank you for following and sorry for the delay. I shall try my best to entertain everyone (new and old, I mean everyone) who decide to read this with the little musings that stem from this brain of mine.

So, what have you guys been up to? Do fill me in with what is it that I’ve missed till now!

Also

Did you…..

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Source : Google Images

A Walk That Hurts

Waking up in the morning listening to the sounds of the rain pouring out, I was happy for some unknown reason. Maybe it was a good dream that I saw which I obviously don’t remember, or maybe I just feel happy internally which is very strange. The reason remained unknown but I had a feeling it’d be a good day.

Boy was I wrong.

I put my feet down on the floor and stand up to only start feeling pain. Where is the pain coming from? Don’t know. What kind of pain is this? Don’t know either. My mind was asking too many questions and the answers were all unknown. Then it was only while I was sitting on my bed that I realized that it was my left foot which was screaming.
I look down and everything seems fine. I stood up and started walking and found my left foot refusing to touch the ground the way a kid refuses it’s veggies. (Okay even I do that at times but let’s stick to kids now)

While I reach the living room I realize what has happened.
I have managed to hurt my left ankle!

I thought I had just pulled a muscle and disregarded it. Just like I always do. But this time it was my biggest mistake.

Because in the evening my foot had swollen a teeny bit and the pain had reached new heights. I have only now realized that I have sprained my leg.

How did this happen? Why did this happen? When did this happen? Will I ever be able to walk again? What if I have to cut my leg off? Is this something big? Is this a symptom of a disease?
So many useful and useless questions were being asked. I started over-analyzing the situation like I always do and thought it was something huge and freaked myself out! But obviously it wasn’t a huge deal.

You see, I have always boasted about how I have never fractured a bone or hurt myself. This is the very first time I’m experiencing something of this sort so I started jumping to conclusions. Typical me.
There are firsts for everything right? Right?

It’s been two days now and I feel like I’m a lab rat for my mom’s experiments with home remedies. I’ve screamt so much that I’ve amazed myself at my lung’s capabilities. I’ve been in a lot of pain. A lot.

What bothers me the most is my incapability to walk. Yes I get people to do my work for me which is awesome! But I can’t even go to the kitchen to get me some food without going through pain. A simple task like walking would hurt me so much is something I never thought is even possible!

I walk only on one foot. I literally drag my left foot with me wherever I go. It looks like fun but let me tell you, it is NOT fun. I want to cry!

Give me a cane and a bottle of Vicodin pills and you have a female version of Dr. House infront of you. Minus the intelligence of course.

It’s day three today and my pain has reduced a lot. Looks like the experiments are working. But my walking it still funny. I used to trip over nothing before and I still do now. Nothing’s changed maybe? I don’t know.

All of this has taught me the importance of my legs though. Must admit that and appreciate them too!

Have you ever experienced something like this yourself? Share your experiences and you won’t win anything. But you won’t lose anything either right?

A Superhero, Maybe

While coming back home yesterday after meeting with a friend, a little girl crossed my path who looked at me and smiled.  She then stopped me and told me that she had seen me before. I apologized to her telling that I couldn’t remember who she was. She smiled and told me, “A superhero like you can’t remember all the people you rescue right?”

I was confused. Why would she call me a superhero? I was pretty sure she had mistaken me for someone else but then she told me how is it she had met me and it all made sense.

Two months ago an incident had taken place below my building. I was looking after my brother in a play area built for children where I saw two girls occupying the only two swings that are there. One girl must be around 15 years old and the other one must be 14. My equation with the 15 year old has never been good as we clash a lot. Now you can’t expect me to be on good terms with someone who has a lot of ego and gets happiness from plotting against her own friends right?
I was looking after my brother when I heard a girl cry. I turned around to find that there was a little girl who was crying because she wanted to sit on the swing but those two girls weren’t allowing her. The 15 year old was screaming at this tiny little girl telling her that the swing is hers and she won’t give it to the girl. The little girl was bawling her eyes out and she walked away when the 15 year old stood up and told her, “Come here girly. You can have the swing.” I was so happy to see that this girl finally got some sense knocked into her head as the little girl came running back. But obviously I was wrong.
What this big girl did was sit back on the swing as soon as the little one came back. Upset, the little one walked away and the 15 year old stood up again and called her back. The little one came running back and what did the 15 year old do? She sat again. She repeated this routine of hers for around 3 times until the little one eventually had a breakdown. The 15 year old then was telling her friend, “Oh my God look at this kid man! At such a young age she’s acting so brilliantly. Look at the crocodile tears dude. Haha kid you can be a star!” Her friend just laughed with her.

I couldn’t bear it. My eyes were filled with tears as I saw those two girls torment and bully that kid. I walked up to them and screamt at them. This is what happened :

“Is this your swing? Who are you to tell me? I came here first!”

“This isn’t your swing either. You may have come first but you’ve played long enough. This kid is literally begging you and you are bullying her? Are you not human?”

“I’m the one sitting here. It’s my wish.”

“”Get up and let her play. You have to.”

“And what if I don’t?”

“I can’t do anything. But I can only hope that you have a little humanity in you. I know you are smart. Put your brain into use for something good – for once. I know you love bullying kids but I will not stand here and see you do that. She’s a kid and you are elder to her. Do you really want to set a bad image for yourself? I know you don’t care about anyone but yourself. I’m standing here screaming at you for this kid. At least respect my concern, if not me. Can’t I expect something good from you for once?”

Her friend finally decided to speak and this is what we spoke :

“It’s that kid’s fault! Can’t she see that we are playing here? We’ve been playing here for an hour. We are here elders. She can’t respect us?”

“How is it this kid’s fault just tell me? Because she wants to play on the swings that you and your friend have captured and are declaring your property? Let me remind you that these swings are made for kids to play not for teenagers like us. You want respect? Show some respect yourself. I’m elder to you and look at the way you treat me. Respect works two ways. You simply can’t just stand here and demand respect that too from a kid. Give respect and you’ll get respect. Simple as that.”

The 15 year old took her friend and walked away. I told them that if they want to talk behind my back then they don’t need to as they can talk whatever shit they want right in front of me. They just responded with “whatever” and went along.

All this time I din’t see the girl who was standing there all along. When I finally turned around, I saw her gleaming with joy. I made small talk with her as she was playing. When she told me that she was 4 years old, it broke my heart. I witnessed a 15 year old torture a 4 year old mentally just for a swing. What is our world coming to?

The day’s incident is crystal clear in my memory. That’s how I remember the conversations so well. I guess it’s because I don’t get to witness such incidents on a daily basis. And I so hope I never have to.

This girl called me a ‘superhero’ because that day I saved her from all that trash. She told me that now those two girls never trouble her in whatsoever way and I’m just so glad.

But me and a superhero? Really?

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A superhero would mean that I always do good. But honestly speaking, I see myself as a villain. You see, I’ve never liked those two girls. This was my opportunity to blast them off. Verbally of course but in my mind I visualize it something like this :

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And by this if someone else is benefited, then I’m going to consider this as a bonus!

It hurts me so much to think that a 4 year old could be bullied this badly by someone from the same generation as I am. What has happened to humanity? Can someone really get so much of happiness from bullying a kid?

That kid now believes that there is good out there in the world. Growing up her belief in that is most likely to get destroyed, just like how mine is. There are good people out there but the bad overshadows it. She’ll learn that not everything is right in the world, but I don’t want her to learn it now. At this age every kid feels that the world is full of rainbows and butterflies, that fairies are real and magic isn’t just an illusion. I don’t want her innocence to go away this soon. She’s a kid and I want her to enjoy her fairy-tale world – a world where superheroes exist. That phase is a wonderful one. She’ll learn what she has to when she grows up.

I can only hope that no one else will want to snatch her world away from her. From any kid for that matter. They’re just kids for God’s sake. They shouldn’t be subjected to bullying and mental torture especially when they don’t even know what it is they are going through. Let them be.

The Pros And Cons Of Falling Sick

It’s been days since I’ve fallen sick. It started out with a common cold which has now resulted in the worst cold I’ve ever had in my life until now. I can say that with confidence as I have a lot of experience with falling sick. Trust me on that one.

Growing up I was that kid who falls ill every other day. In these 365 days that make a year, around 60 days was when I was healthy – no exaggeration here. My immune system was a serious joke, I couldn’t even call it an immune system!
My memories from the age of 1 till 8 are all about me falling sick. During the days when I din’t fall sick, I used to feel really weird. I was so used to falling sick that the idea of feeling healthy seemed strange.

But not to worry now. My immune system does its job quite well now. I still remember in 4th grade when the teacher told me that I had full attendance I went, “What? Did this just happen?” My teacher had a really puzzled look on her face and maybe in that moment she thought I went crazy. I won’t blame her for thinking that.
It’s not like I don’t fall sick at all now. That’s never gonna happen. It’s just that the frequency rate is quite a bit low. I only fall sick when the weather changes and when I eat something my stomach still doesn’t accept in it’s land. And that’s so much better for me.

As you can see, a lot of my life’s experiences are related around illnesses. So since my body is still in recovery from this annoying cold which has given me a fever, a sore throat, a runny nose, a back pain and a head ache -all in the span of five days – I thought it’s a good time to share with you all some of my expertise. After all that’s why we are here, to share our pain with each other. When I know I can make you suffer by making you read this poorly written post then I’m not going to miss out on this opportunity. I suffer so you suffer. Muahahaha

Now falling sick isn’t all that bad. You do get a lot of benefits from this. And as all the wise people have said, we need to look at the positive side of the bad stuff happening to us which will help us find a way through it all. They din’t exactly say this but I’m pretty sure it’s something along these lines.

So now you and me are going to go through the pros of falling sick :

1. The Royal Treatment – Since you are incapable of doing things for yourself, the people around you readily do it for you. This obviously means that you have to do absolutely nothing. You can just lay in bed and ask someone to pass you the book that is in the shelf near you, and they will come running from the other room to do just that. It’s the perfect time to be lazy.
2. Getting to sleep the day through – We everyday complain about how much we lose out on sleep because of our hectic schedules. Even the weekend sometimes gets too cramped up with so much to do. Since our body is already too weak, you can easily go to sleep without any fuss. Nobody and nothing is going to disturb your precious sleep.
3. All the food you want – You get to eat a lot of food and no one is going to complain about that. Whatever you want, you get it. From soup to cake – everything. Except cold stuff. Why would you want something cold in the first place? Aren’t you ill? Oh wait….you can’t eat everything. Few exceptions can be made right?
4. Temporary leave from the horrid places – You get to take leave from wherever it is you’re supposed to be. Either the office or school. You’re free! And when you go back, you have a whole new energy inside of you. Let’s be honest, it’ll get drained out the minute you set foot into the place again – but let’s leave that out right now.
5. Unleashing the anger 
– Do you know about all that anger which you have been suppressing inside of you from the past months (or maybe years)? The ones that were caused by either some nagging relative or by that annoying colleague at your work place? You never are able to let it all out but looks like the golden opportunity has now arrived. You can let all of your anger out on basically anyone without worrying that you are going to upset them. Why? Because they know you are sick so they are going to forgive you. They won’t even take your outbursts seriously. Such a relief for you isn’t it?

 

Now we need to get to the darker side of all this. The negatives of falling ill are a lot. Like a lot. So let’s get to them now. Together of course. I’m not leaving you now.

1. Life sucked out of the body – That cold has eaten up every bit of life that remains in your body. You forget what walking feels like. Do not even talk about the energy levels. They are at a whole new level of low. Wait a minute. What is energy? I don’t remember feeling energetic. Are you saying I used to be energetic once? That was a lifetime ago mate.
2. Plastic surgery might be a requirement – At least that’s what you think. Your face is discolored. You’ve actually become pale and if your friends visit you then they are going to crack jokes about how you may have turned into a vampire. In a matter of days you feel like your face has changed shape. You look at yourself in the mirror and scream, “That’s not me! Who is this person? That’s not meee!!”
3. The weird feeling of being tired – Feeling tired is the weirdest feeling ever you experience when you’re sick. Why? Because how in the world can you get tired by doing absolutely nothing? You’re just laying in bed and now you’re tired? What is happening?
4. Losing out on sleep – As I said in the pros – you can sleep to your heart’s content. But somehow you just can’t. This is the only opportunity for you to sleep but your body refuses to do so. You’re so sleepy but still you can’t sleep. You try all sorts of things to fall asleep but everything goes to waste.

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5. The death of the beloved taste buds – You can eat anything you want but what’s the use when you can’t taste anything? Your favorite cake tastes bland. Pizza tastes like plain bread. Food isn’t food anymore. This is so cruel! I’m just going to sit by myself here and cry …..
6. Anger level = Hulk – Every little thing angers you. Even if you drop a drop of water you are going to get so angry you could punch a wall. You are not going to be able to get through the day with a straight face. You are not going to be happy. The only emotion you feel is anger.
7. Horrible tasting medicines – Do I really need to explain this?
8. Talk no more – I talk a lot. Really, really a lot. And this one hurts me a lot. I lose the ability to talk even when I get a slight fever. If I even try to talk, then I get really tired. If I have a sore throat then I lose my voice which is the most frustrating thing in this whole world for me. I want the ability to express myself through my voice. I need it!

By the looks of it, the cons outweigh the pros in this case. So here’s the lesson people – even if the good side seems brighter, do not fall sick. I repeat, don’t fall sick. It’s the most torturous thing in this entire universe. Try your level best to avoid getting hit by those bacteria that take over your body and make you feel less human.

And if your efforts to stay away from this situation fails miserably and you end up falling sick, then I’m here for you.

What are somethings that you experience when you fall sick?

Things No One Should Say To Me Anymore

I think this week’s post’s title is self-explanatory. So I’m gonna skip the general 2 paragraph introduction I always give you. Why waste your time reading that, when you could spend your time productively? ( I know that when you read ‘productively’ you immediately thought of Facebook and Twitter. Yes I’m watching you. -cue evil laugh-)

I don’t know what is with people asking me weird and senseless stuff. Not to mention the nonsensical language that many speak in. Like hello, that is what I do okay?
Anyways, all this really irritates me to the point where I start making plans on how to kill them. To be honest, I get irritated by every little thing. I even get irritated at myself at times.
So today I’ve decided to take a step against this. Now I’ll list what all I have to go through on a regular basis. All the things I’m tired of hearing.

1. “How are you so thin? Give us tips please?”
I’m not so thin also. Have you seen others? As for the tips, if I knew wouldn’t I have already released a book and made millions out of it? If you think I have some sort of healthy lifestyle, then I’m sorry to pop your bubble *eats a Pringle* The only tip I can give you, is keep eating. Food is life. You shouldn’t ignore food.

2. “You are a foodie? What? How is it that you eat so much, but end up being so thin?”
You see, I’m blessed with something called a “high metabolism”. Just rub a lamp and ask the genie that comes out to bless you with a high metabolism too, okay? How much ever I eat, it doesn’t affect me. I sometimes feel that the more I eat, the more weight I lose! So now, why will I not take advantage of this and eat my heart out? Do I look like some sort of a fool to you? I’d be a fool if I wasn’t eating when I’m hungry. And I’m always hungry. ALWAYS.

3. “Why do you eat all unhealthy things? All the sweets, and junk food too! Do you not care about your health?”
Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t know that you only eat healthy food. Wait, you don’t? Then why you asking me huh? I’m actually advised my doctor to eat unhealthy food so that it’ll help me gain weight. I’m doing something good. So stop judging me and passing me comments you idiots.
Now,

I realize that there are two GIFS of Jennifer Lawrence here. But what to do, she understands my food situation  more than anyone out there. An amazing celebrity gets me. Now why will I not tell you that?

4. “What is your favourite food?”
How dare you ask me this question? How can you possibly ask me to choose? Food is food. You can’t command me. You can’t do that to me. And besides, what are you going to gain by knowing this huh?

5. “Why are you so short?”
I’m short because I gifted my height to you, so that you can become tall. I’m doing a good deed, so shut up and thank me now.
And also, being short has its advantages. I like being short. Wait a minute, there are people who are shorter than me! So are you telling me you waste spend your time by asking this question to every short person who crosses your path? Nice hobby I must admit.

Now you understand right?

6. “You’re  a nerd right? How lucky. You don’t have to study!”
Wow, what a nice logic. You surely have a brilliant brain. I wonder why you don’t get good grades….
Oh I know, it’s because you actually are plain stupid. You thought I was complimenting you? Another fact that proves you’re stupid. We nerds have to study more, because we have a reputation to keep up. Did that make sense to you now?

This how I react inside when such a question is asked.
I think I speak for all the nerds out there, here.

7. All the ‘cool’ words used while speaking. Meaning, all the “YOLO”s and “SWAG”s
I don’t know who created these words, but I think that is good because that person would probably be dead right now. Can you believe it? It’s 2014, and there are people who STILL say ‘YOLO’ for everything and anything. Have you sold your brain to someone, or is it on a permanent hiatus? If you think this makes you cool, then you have a bunch of ice-cubes for a brain. I’m so sorry to break this news to you.
Now stop using these words, please! Have some mercy on us!

Yes please!

8. “How many books have you read?” And all the other book-related questions.
Yes I’m a bookworm, but I’m a disgrace to all the bookworms out there because I haven’t read a lot of books. I have my reasons for that. But YOU can’t ask me such questions and make me feel bad okay? And how many ever books I’ve read, I don’t think I need to tell you. Why do I need to answer you? Do you really think I’m gonna answer these questions that you ask almost everyone? Have you ever even read a book in the first place?

9. “Why do you love certain celebrities so much? Why do you follow so many shows and fandoms?”
Remind me the next time I start following a celebrity to ask you for permission okay? Oh wait, I don’t need your permission. So then why does it bother you? The entertainment world entertains me more than your non-sense does. Now, doesn’t that make sense?

10. “What social networking sites are you on?”
Why do you want to know? So that you can annoy me there also? If I haven’t told you already, then it means I don’t want you to know. Why is it so hard to understand such simple things? Why?

So there you go. This is my list. I think there are more, but I can’t seem to recollect anymore at the moment. And now I realize that most of this is related to food. Well, that’s me.
Now it’s your turn. What are some of the things that annoy you the most?

To care or not to care?

Its been a while since I’ve posted something serious. Serious in my mind at least. So today I’m gonna post about a topic that I’ve always wondered about.

Everyone is always thinking who cares about them or who will care about them. There’s not a single soul who wouldn’t want at least one person to genuinely care about them. But I find it weird when one expects someone to care about them, but the person doesn’t care about them in return.
Confused? Me too.

Believe it or not, we live in a world full of expectations. Reality is something we refuse to come back to and as a result we keep flying to expectations that we know we can’t expect to be true. I also have expectations – from family, friends and life. But I know that I need to keep them realistic. I can’t expect something from someone, when I know I can’t get it. The same way goes for the term ‘care’.

Expecting genuine care and concern from someone is easy, but caring for someone deeply is tough. I know so many people who constantly crib about no one caring for them but do they care for anyone in the manner they want back? The answer is mostly no. So if you can’t care for anyone then how possibly could you expect it in return?
The funny thing is that mostly there will be someone caring for them, but its neglected which obviously means that the care they receive isn’t appreciated. And then they go around telling that no one cares about them. Isn’t that weird? Someone cares about them so deeply but they don’t seem to notice it which in turn means that the person giving them care isn’t getting anything back! They are genuinely concerned for someone and in turn are treated badly. What do they get from caring for someone? Nothing at all. And they feel like not caring for anyone anymore at all.

There also the opposite to not caring for anyone. Its called over-caring and I’ve just learnt about it. Over-caring it seems means that you care for someone so much that the person on the receiving end feels suffocated. You care about someone so deeply that in return you want to know everything about them. This type of caring could be good according to me if you are extremely close with the other person but it isn’t right if you hardly even know them.

So the question here is, do we need to care for someone? Because we know that caring for someone could result in two things. One being that you in return won’t be cared about and the second being that the care you receive would be disturbing. So is it really necessary to care? Well my answer is yes.

I’ve grown up with only the genuine care from my family but not friends. As a kid I cared about every friend but was shattered to know that they din’t even bother to know if I’m still beside them. People came and went and I cared for everyone but what did I get? Nothing, absolutely nothing. I started thinking what was the point of me caring for an individual when I won’t get that in return? I was going to stop caring until I met the friends that I have now. I din’t care for them at first thinking I’m gonna be let down again like how I’ve been from the past years but when I couldn’t help but feel for them genuinely. And then I was so shocked to actually be receiving the affection that I had been giving to others from such a long time. I felt blessed to be in the vicinity of people who actually cared about my existence. What I did affected them and I couldn’t be happier.

I might not have many people who care about me, but I know there are a few people out there. I sometimes do ‘over-care’ but I know I do it for the right people because they don’t mind it. Of course when it goes out of hand they tell me and well, I just stop. But that doesn’t mean that they will stop caring for me. We have that understanding and everything’s back to normal.

But I still do sometimes feel that the care I show to others is not what I get in return. I’m not on the top of anyone’s list but does that stop me? Nope. I know that caring for the right people will always be the best for me and the people around me. I can’t care for each and everyone and expect them for something in return. That’s not fair either for me or for them. So I’ve learnt that if I am to care for someone, I need to be sure that that person deserves it. As for over-caring, I feel its fine when you do it with the right people. But you shouldn’t for people who don’t deserve it. Why waste your energy on someone who’s going to not appreciate what you do for them? What would you benefit from knowing everything about someone’s life while they think you aren’t needed in their life and are irritated with you?

So what I say is, find the middle to this caring thing. You don’t have to go to the extremes. You don’t have to care about someone who doesn’t feel the same way and you don’t need to care about someone so much that it hurts both you and them. You know why? Because there are people out there who want your care and concern and they are the ones who deserve it. Not someone who will never appreciate what you do for them, or worse, you. And trust me when I say this, you don’t need to waste your time for such people.
Caring for someone, and get the same back is a wonderful feeling. You feel appreciated and loved. So be wise when you do so.
And one more thing, if you know someone who cares about you then treat them right. Don’t neglect them because that hurts them a lot.  Appreciate what you have with you!

I really don’t know if any of this made any sense. I just hope it did as according to me its something really important because I’ve been through this quite a lot and I know it feels.